Trading Chocolate for Sex

So it begins... this journey of mine, trading a love for my love. I love chocolate, sweets, and pretty much food in general. It is something I do when I am happy, sad, bored... or in the mood. It is something that gets in the way of me being all I know that God has for me. Food is keeping me from being my best because I don't have an off switch. I become obsessed with what I eat, don't eat, and how I am going to overcome. I have read all the books and decided this time around I will write my own plan. So here I go..a little about me...

I have absolutely no willpower when it comes to food. If it is there... I want it. I am the chick at the party that is always wondering... "I wonder when we are going to eat..." or "I wonder if there will be dessert." But this is the deal. I am done being bigger than I want to be. I am done not having the confidence to be the sex partner I want to be for my fabulous husband. Sure he loves me as I am... but I know I could be better and because of this knowledge... I know I want to give him the best. I want to be the hot babe he married. Actually I want to be hotter than the girl he married. I don't have any particular person in mind when I say this, but have you seen the women who seem to just keep getting better and better with age. I would say they are rare... but when you see them you think... dang, she must be doing something right. I think she is having great sex. Maybe I am wrong. And truly, there is probably more to it than just that. However, I think it is part of the pretty picture she has painted for herself.

I also believe the only way my habits are truly going to change is to give it to God. I have done this before to no avail on my own part... but I know God cares about me... and I know he understands I will suffer through the trying period of overcoming my sugar addiction. But this time I will rest in knowing that He too suffered. And as I suffer in this very small way to better myself to become more the woman He has always desired me to become... He will remain by my side and be cheering me on. It may come in the form of praises from my husband, random comments on my blog, encouragement from friends, etc... but it will be God's voice that gets me through and overcomes this particular area of sin in my life.

The reason I know this food addiction is a sin... is for the simple reason that I always feel entangled and choked by it. Anything that has that affect cannot be good for a person.

I have a few ideas how I am going to tackle this feat... God at the forefront, this writing thing as a place to vent, my husband as accountability, my goals and dreams as something to strive towards and smart planning to prepare myself to avoid and conquer all temptations.

I have carefully planned a months worth of menus. I am going grocery shopping for only the things needed to make the meals to prepare for my family. I have what I like to call a "goal bowl" that I will fill three times daily with the appropriate amount of healthy food in the right proportions. Along with one protein drink and some fruit. There will be no chocolate or sweets in the house. I will not volunteer to bring cookies for any occasion... because I cannot resist licking the bowl. So, if you have cake or cookies... keep them away from me. I don't want them... in fact... I don't think I even like them anymore. Yes, that is what I am going to convince myself on this journey. I don't even like all that gross food anymore. I am trading my old, worn out taste buds for new ones and I am going to train them right this time around. Throw out the white stuff, replace it with a colorful array of foods to keep my body fresh, smooth, and healthy.

So, come on, join with me as you watch me battle this struggle to its death.